Thursday, February 18, 2010
So what is love?
When Swee asked that question during combined session a month ago, i looked to Melvyn and said, wow the answer's really long - and we couldn't answer then, neither can we now. The group has since then been holding many discussions on what this sentence may mean:
"attraction is a form of cognition which commits the will, but commits it because it is already committed by it"
Our conclusion: The late Pope John Paul II is a genius.
The following comes from my understanding so far and may not be the exact interpretation of Pope John Paul II's piece - Love and Responsibility.
Do we desire something because it is good? Or is something good because we desire it?
First, we have to understand the underlying sexual urge in each individual - this urge is nothing lustful and is not an instinct, rather it is an orientation in every individual towards certain attributes of a person of the opposite sex. The above question draws a dilemma as to wherein does the "value" or "good" lie? Where is the source of the value, the desire or the object/subject?
The second question is correct - He explains that the sexual urge is much more basic than the psychological and physiological attributes in man and woman. The attributes in another person of the opposite sex have a value of goodness because of our innate sexual urge - because of this orientation that God has placed in us, we identify by nature the goodness in the other person.
Moving on: Attraction, as the late Pope writes it, is definite for each individual - that everyone has a specific set of attributes that they would be attracted to. As our own sexual urge identifies and gives value to the good of the other person, the value in the other person would then be the attribute that attracts us. It acts as a knot tied with two strings.
So when we begin to be attracted to a person, our sexual urge prompts our cognition to "want" that good in the other person. We are in other words, drawn to this attribute that we find in another person, driven to appreciate it and hence be attracted to it. This part would explain why attraction is a form of cognition that commits the will.
This is where the confusing second part of the sentence above comes into play. As I have explained that it is a knot tied with two strings - the sexual urge giving value to the attribute and the attribute in turn becomes the source of attraction. So the second part of "but commits it, because it is already committed by it," is saying that I am attracted to this girl because in the first place, the sexual urge in me had already identified the good and placed the value on her attributes - which in turn attract me. I am already committed to be attracted to these attributes, because my sexual urge is what that gave these attributes its value in my eyes and in my mind.
Ever heard the song 情非得已? Attraction cannot be helped because it roots from our own innate sexual desire. Ever felt that you can't help but feel attracted to someone, do you actually need to exercise your will to decide whether you are attracted to the girl/boy or not? I think this is your answer!
Phew, that took pretty long to craft and I hope my interpretation is right and has helped clear some confusion.
Mark